Poetry | Susan Stubbings

ONCE

Once I was a Human Being

Death waits for no one

Now I am free

I am a butterfly

Loose from

My cocoon

I am a bird

Flying high in the sky

As you fill the dawn

With dis-ease

Think again

Of me

Once I was a Human Being

Now I am the clouds

Floating across the sky

I am the wind

The light

The stars

Can you not see

I am free?

Flying above the ocean

Soaring high

Catching the current of the

Gentle breeze

Once I was a Human Being

Knowing all, I needed

To know, walking the earth

Now I flow

Like a river

Calm

Do not weep for me

Can you not see

I am free?

I am free

Of my pain

My grief

Count the ways

You love me

Have me

in your heart

As you live, live on

For the both of us .......

You are a Human Being

Live on

One day we will

Be reunited

Then we can reminisce

Together

Forever ...........

SJS July 2016

A Parents lament

This emotional maelstrom

They call grief, for the loss of our

precious beloved, we love so deep.

Stolen, why? Why us? Why me?

There are no words, to describe

this insoluble, unsolvable,

crime of life, it’s out of order,

The silent scream strangulates

in the darkness of this living

We are, I am, numbed, squashed,

into a non-verbal mishmosh.

In beats and veins and breath,

I just am, and we are

All that humans are given

This Silent explosion, no parent should

be made to hold. The apple of our eye,

of this requisite, no choice was made

This dull roaring ache, fills every cell and

bone, our hearts in two, perforated, open wide, and here

here we sit heartbroken, raw, yet

driven forward, because of precious nobility

Sitting here in the garden of living

Contemplating, what’s the point?

Dawns intuitively a retort

It’s woeful, heavy painful repeat

We live on to bear witness too, who was

and still is. Shhh, don’t say a word

Nothing can fill this empty void

hold my hand, let me cry,

for the desecration of our lives

We are proud parents forever and beyond

Graciously remembering all of

Loving caring ways, times made us

laugh and cry, the way

they blossomed and grew

and the endless sunshine that is you

Until we meet again, we hold you tight in

our hearts., in our minds, because

our love for you will never die.

ODES & POETRY

Written by

Susan Stubbings

Peace will come

When reflecting over the worn time

And the new seems to be

A very distant shore … unreachable

When life seems one long struggle

Bathing in the deep

Pain searing at your feet

Waiting to engulf you it may seem

Ticking like a wobbling clock

Words torn, forlorn …... word no more

When your world seems all

Defective

When life’s cycle is all about

Missing ……

Your beloved, them, you, me,

myself, I and living seems like

A hard bristled brush

Made of steel, made of stone

Shooing you along

The currents of your breath

Sweeping you aside

Feelings all-encompassing

Others cannot see

Understand

Breathe .......... Inhale deep

Times gone by … Time waits

For no man, woman or child

The crow flies

Here you are today

Reflecting on what was

Recall memories

The harmony and the discord

In equal measure

You may weep

All seen hanging in the balance

Write their names within your heart

Write them bold, write them clear

They are forever near secure

In your very essence they live on ….

So live for them today, tomorrow

and beyond. Wipe your tears

On the handkerchief of a new dawn

Your heart whispers how great

thou art for enduring

For holding on

For Being

Its been no simple feat

Hear the sounds of your own beat …

You may be weary, tired, depleted

As echoes thunder

Look for your sunshine

Within the rain

Swift Be

Embrace your inner divine

These are, were and will be again

The days of your life

Embrace wholeheartedly your living

Remember

The Pendulum Of Perpetually

Is in motion for your choosing

Take hold and

Abide with me

We shall ride this eventide

As the old year draws to a close

Celebrate your strength

Celebrate your courage

Celebrate your fortitude

Celebrate YOU

CELEBRATE ………

Peace O Pending

Peace is near

Peace will come

This circle of Love

We sit in this circle

To continue making some sense

Of our sorrow and heartache

That will never be spent

This grief that none of us

Would wish upon another

To meet ....

Dare I even whisper?

What we all know

A circle of life complete

The shock and the pain

Causes me to be inside myself

Lost a part of me that contained

My precious you

Yet the bond we have with our

Precious ones forever to hold

Is Love ...

With love we can go forward

So the Spirit and essence of our Child

Lives on in us and through us

So as we sit in this circle

Let each of us re-member

Our precious Child
Time past becomes times present

To times future

Because the circle of love

Never dies....

I Miss You

I miss you like

The breath of life

This searing pain

Hath no respite

I go on not for me

But for all

That was you, me, us

I miss you like

The breath of life

This searing pain

Hath no respite

Yet this empty void,

exhales love, in this breeze

this Inclement breath

I miss you like

The breath of life

I feel your arms

Squeezing tight

The essence of you

Abounds and all feels

OK for a little while

I miss you

Let your dreams set sail

Susan Stubbings

Doncaster - South Yorkshire