Learned Helplessness What is it?

What is learned helplessness

Learned Helplessness as coined by Martin Seligman and Steven Maier in the 1960s is a feeling of powerlessness or helplessness the individual feels they have no control over the situation/s they are experiencing. 

This in turn leads to a lack of motivation and passivity in thoughts and behaviours and can be linked to depression.

Learned helplessness affects many people who have been involved in repeated exposure to uncontrollable events which are negative, it can also be from perceived lack of control and/or generalised helpless behaviours. 

For example, when a doctor tells a person they have depression and the person just accepts this and blames all their  behaviour from that diagnosis on the ‘depression’, i.e. “I’m depressed what do you expect”.  Or a Child who has been continually abused, neglected or abandoned and found themselves in situations they have no control over and learn they can’t help themselves no matter how they try.

This is because a child has no power or control over what happens to them, children are wholly dependant on the adults, parents, families or care givers to survive.  This evokes compliance in the child so they learn to people please, be the good, perfect or try hard child so not to evoke displeasure and more in the adults around them. Learned helplessness leaves us with self doubt always questioning ourself and not trusting we can do things for ourself.

When repeated stressors or failures are experienced that we feel we have no influence over, may stop us trying to change or do anything that might help.  This behaviour will continue even when there is evidence to suggest things have actually changed and a sense of control is possible.  When we eventually become an adult these emotional and psychological patterns are already grounded and have power over us in our internal world.

In short, the person believes:

• They are powerless.

• Feel they can’t change their situation even when opportunity presents itself to the contrary.

• Holds a belief that nothing will or can change – because they’ve tried all they know already.

• Can be heard saying:

  •  ”I’m helpless”, I’m hopeless”, “I can’t change so why bother”, I’m not good enough” or “it’s all my fault”. " its how I've always been".

These are all statements of a Learnt Helpless mindset and have conditioned our belief system to believe they are true – they are not.

Learned helplessness leads to a lot of stress in our here and now living and this leads to anxiety states such as OCD, Panic distress, Social Anxiety, Agoraphobia, Health anxiety, General Anxiety Distress (GAD) and many more anxiety related distresses.

This can lead to many symptoms in our behaviours, emotions, cogitations and physicality causing psychosomatic distresses – so NO it’s not all in your head your body keeps hold of all these distresses from childhood and causes us difficulty in adulthood if they are not processed and resolved.

THE GOOD NEWS

The good news is, this mindset can be changed it won’t be easy but it’s very possible, with conscious thought and effort to embrace change.

WHAT CAN WE DO?

• We need to recognise and acknowledge its possible Learned Helplessness is a psychological and emotional pattern you used to survive as a child - that’s the first step.

• Begin to build a safe environment with safe people to support us heal.

• Catch and challenge negative thoughts get to know what you hear in your conscious mind.

• Identify situations where you feel powerless and explore the belief attached to the powerless thoughts.  Ask yourself is this belief based on facts or its what I've always thought.  If its what you’ve always thought automatically - challenge the thought.

• Look for the evidence this thought that fuels a belief is true - they are more than likely not true.

• Break your challenge down to one step at a time activate your parasympathetic system to help you stay calm and regulate your nervous system. Use self-soothing techniques to support yourself (see my other blogs how to do this)

• Self-care is a must become your best friend.

In short Learnt Helplessness is a mindset that has been learnt and perfected over many years, one which can be broken down into steps and replaced with a resilient mindset a “can do” mindset instead of a “can’t”.

Because our brain is so clever it also has a built in natural ability called Neuroplasticity which is our brains capacity to change, nothing is fixed. With neuroplasticity our neurons and neural networks can build different pathways forming new connections and overriding old ones or strengthening existing pathways. Our brain has ability to reorganise pathways in response to new information, environment changes and recover from injury, illness, trauma and rewire our anxiety beliefs.

We need to feel safe for changes to begin and to last but once our brain and our nervous systems begin working together in collaboration and harmony we can achieve safety.

You can break free of this negative mindset and become the real you, the you you’ve always wanted to be, the key is consistency, perseverance and practice, practice, practice the steps above are the beginning are you ready to begin?

If you are struggling or want further steps I offer a free 30 mins video call so we can meet before our first session. Contact me at email: pendulumofpeace8@gmail.com text or Whatsapp message to 07867938630 and lets connect and realise your fullest potentials.